thE pOwErs thAt bE

yEs... jAmEs cAmErOn’s Epic $300 milliOn cOmpUtEr gEnErAtEd visiOn Of thE fictiOnAl plAnEt pAndOrA is AstOUnding. i think whAt mAkEs cAmErOn’s AvAtAr prOjEct EspEciAlly prOfOUnd And incisivE is it’s UnsEttling AUthEnticity.

OK, sO thE film’s 10-fOOt blUE nA’vi indigEnEs, its flOAting hAllElUjAh mOUntAins And whAt sOmE hAvE cAllEd its nEw AgE EcO-spiritUAlity mAy sEEm A littlE OvEr thE tOp,  bUt thE mEtAphOrs hErE rEsOnAtE likE An intErplAnEtAry AlArm clOck... with nO snOOzE. hUmAns bEttEr wAkE Up.
nAtUrE… Or mOthEr nAtUrE As shE is mOrE rEspEctfUlly knOwn... is nO jOkE.
hUmAns, nUmbskUllEd prOfitEErs, - try As thEy mAy tO rOb nAtUrE Of hEr tAngiblE rEsOUrcEs, dEvOUr hEr frUit, hArnEss hEr strEngths, pOisOn hEr ArtEriEs, mElt hEr icy rEsErvE And tAmE hEr cErtAin chAOs – rEAlly dOn’t stAnd A chAncE.
hUmAns... wE think wE sO fly with OUr fAncy sciEncE & civilizAtiOn... bUt nExt tO nAtUrE wE ArE ExActly thAt... nExt tO nAtUrE.
lOvE, rEspEct And listEn tO OUr mOthEr.

gOnE nA'vi

sO i linEd Up with thE mAssEs, rOckEd thE 3D glAssEs, sUspEndEd my disbEliEf & hElpEd jAmEs cAmErOn rEcUpE sOmE Of his $300milliOn... And i hAvE tO sAy it wAs prEtty AwEsOmE.
cAll it whAt yOU will - crEAtivE EpiphAny Or Epic visiOn - thE nEw blOckbUstEr dEfinitEly trAnspOrtEd mE tO AnOthEr plAcE... nAmEly pAndOrA... And lEft mE fEEling AshAmEd Of my spEciEs. i AlmOst chOkEd On my hEArt As i wAtchEd thE sOUl-lEss hUmAns mAssAcrE thE lithE & nOblE nA'vi pEOplEs Of pAndOrA. thE hypEr-impEriAl grEEd, ignOrAncE And mAchismO Of thE hUmAns in thEir qUEst tO rOb pAndOrA Of it's nAtUrAl rEsOUrcEs - thE prEciOUs 'UnObtAniUm' - wAs distUrbingly symbOlic. As An hOmmAgE tO bOth thE vAriOUs indigEnOUs pEOplEs Of OUr plAnEt whO hAvE sUffErEd (And cOntinUE tO sUffEr) gEnOcidAl viOlEncE & dEgrAdAtiOn And tO OUr plAnEt thAt hAs likEwisE bEEn rOyAlly scrEwEd OvEr by mAnkind, AvAtAr is sOmE pOwErfUl shit.
thE nA'vi pEOplEs' spiritUAl intErcOnnEctEdnEss with thEir (visUAlly stUnning) nAtUrAl EnvirOnmEnt is jUxtApOsEd AgAinst thE high-tEch hUmAn sEEk & dEstrOy EthOs... it's All hAnd-cArvEd ArrOws vErsUs wEApOns Of mAss dEstrUctiOn.

thErE ArE sEvErAl prOfOUnd spiritUAl rEsOnAncEs thrOUghOUt thE film bUt thE OnE thAt hit mE thE hArdEst wAs whEn nEytiri - thE hOt nA'vi hErOinE - tElls jAkE - thE sElf-pOssEssEd nA'vi-in-trAining - thAt "All EnErgy is Only bOrrOwEd And EvEntUAlly yOU hAvE tO givE it bAck." nOw thAt is whAt i'm tAlkin bOUt! sO pOignAnt. it wAs likE thE mOmEnt in lOrd Of thE rings whEn gAndAlf tElls frOdO thAt, in lifE, "All thAt wE mUst dO is dEcidE whAt tO dO with thE timE thAt wE ArE givEn". dOnchA jUst lOvE A mOviE with A mEssAgE!?

frEsh lil princE

"pErfEctiOn is AchiEvEd, nOt whEn thErE is nOthing mOrE tO Add, bUt whEn thErE is nOthing lEft tO tAkE AwAy" - AntOinE dE sAint-ExUpEry

high & dry

pUtting tOgEthEr prOmO mAtEriAls fOr thE 2009 high & dry fEstivAl i hAvE discOvErEd A fEAst Of nEw AUstrAliAn mUsic & Art. thE fEstivAl is An indEpEndEnt, pArticipAnt fUndEd EvEnt shOwcAsing OvEr 100 lOcAl bAnds And Artists. thE fEstivAl sEts Up cAmp frOm 27-29 nOvEmbEr 2009 On AbOriginAl lAnd At cAmp wOllOmi And fEstivAl fUnds ArE invEstEd in thE sitE’s cOnsErvAtiOn. A lOt Of lOvE hAs gOnE intO prOdUcing thE EvEnt... it’s gOnnA bE A sEnsOry EpiphAny!
thEsE ArE A fEw Of my fAvEs frOm thE linEUp:
cOmbAt wOmbAt

shinE

it’s bEEn A bit Of A hiAtUs... i gUEss yOU cOUld sAy i’vE hAd writEr’s blOg – bAdOOmbOOm. i’vE bEEn OwnEd by ExAms, prEsEntAtiOns And EssAys thEsE pAst cOUplE mOnths. stUdEnt lifE is jUst nOt sExy. bUt yEstErdAy, likE pOpEyE On A spinAch bEndEr, i jUst hAd tO brEAk Out. i EscApEd thE rUbblE Of bOOks, pOst-it nOtEs And jOUrnAls yEstErdAy tO indUlgE in A lil pOp cUltUrE... MJ in ‘this is it’.

it wAs An EEriE ExpEriEncE wAtching thE film in A mAssivE Empty cinEmA... thE intEnsifiEd immEdiAcy mAdE it fEEl mOrE pErsOnAl. it’s A gOOd thing i brOUght thE klEEnEx (ActUAlly my slEEvE) bEcAUsE i hAd A littlE griEving tO dO. sEEing MJ bEhind thE scEnEs On thE big scrEEn wAs A bittErswEEt rEmindEr Of whAt An AmAzing tAlEnt And mUsicAl piOnEEr thE wOrld hAs lOst. thErE hAs nEvEr bEEn AnyOnE likE michAEl jAcksOn And tO AnyOnE trying tO imitAtE him... pfft fOrgEt it! his visiOn wAs inspirAtiOnAl, his crEAtivity wAs tEnAciOUs. I think it’s his mUsicAl dirEctOr, michAEl bEArdEn, whO prAisEs MJ As thE UltimAtE mUsicAl prOfEssiOnAl – hE knEw All Of his sOngs insidE OUt. bUt wAtching MJ pUt tOgEthEr thE prOdUctiOn, i fElt likE his immErsiOn in thE rEsOnAncE, lAngUAgE And mEAning Of his mUsic mOvEd bEyOnd “bEing prOfEssiOnAl” intO thE rEAlm Of bEing spiritUAl. EvEry nOtE wAs fElt.

it’s sO sAd thAt this is it.

bUt it’s nOt ‘this is it’ likE thAt’s All fOlks. it’s ‘this is it’ likE this is An UnqUAntifiAblE ExpAnsE Of pOssibility. As lifE hAs tAUght mE, Oh sO mAny timEs, nO lOss nOr gAin is AbsOlUtE. wE hAvE lOst MJ frOm Our mOrtAl rAnks bUt his mUsic And his mEssAgE livE On thrOUgh Us. thOUgh thErE will nEvEr bE AnOthEr king Of pOp, thErE will bE mOrE mUsic, sOUl And lOvE. likE MJ tOld his 24 yEAr Old AUssiE gUitArist, OriAnthi, dUring rEhEArsAls “jUst shinE”... wOw... imAginE bEing in hEr shOEs... if yOU sAy sO michAEl :) MJ’s bAckUp singEr, jUdith hill, wAs shining bright in thE film... hEr smOOthE vOicE And nAtUrAl vibE killEd mE. shE’s my nEw mUsic crUsh. chEck hEr Out. AppArEntly shE grEw Up in A mUsicAl hOmE... EvEry hOmE shOUld bE A mUsicAl hOmE!

thEy dOn't mAkE Em likE thEy UsEd tO

it’s bEEn A hEAvy wEEk.
At 8.02Am On fridAy mOrning i cOppEd thE nEws Of michAEl jAcksOn’s dEAth.
it sEEmEd kind Of EArly fOr A tExt mEssAgE - Michael Jackson! Can’t believe it! – fOllOwEd shOrtly thErEAftEr by AnOthEr – Michael Jackson is dead – And AnOthEr, And sO On.
As i scOUrEd thE intErnEt fOr cOnfirmAtiOn i cAmE AcrOss cOUntlEss tribUtEs And ExprEssiOns Of lOvE & grAtitUdE.

it wAs OvErwhElming.
sO mAny pEOplE fEEling sUch An AcUtE sEnsE Of lOss.
thE sAdnEss Of lOsing A lOvEd OnE - OrdinArily A vEry privAtE And pErsOnAl ExpEriEncE – On blAst. thE whOlE wOrld hEld its brEAth fOr A mOmEnt As thE mEdiA cOnfirmEd thAt michAEl hAd tAkEn his lAst. And thEn thE cOllEctivE rEspOnsE tO his UntimEly dEAth... wOw... nOthing shOrt Of ExtrAOrdinAry.
i wOn’t gEt intO All Of my pErsOnAl michAEl jAcksOn AnEcdOtEs bUt lEt’s jUst sAy thAt thrillEr wAs my first AlbUm EvEr And yEs i did rOck An MJ vinyl discO bAg in thE 80s. thE wOrld OvEr pEOplE hAvE stOriEs likE minE. yOU cOUld bE blAzing jUnglE trAils thrOUgh thE AmAzOn, didgEridOO jAmmin in thE AUstrAliAn OUtbAck Or sAving pOlAr bEArs in thE Arctic... whErEvEr yOU gO thE nAmE michAEl jAcksOn mEAns sOmEthing. it’s hArd gEtting my hEAd ArOUnd hOw OnE pErsOn cAn mAkE sUch A dEEp cUltUrAl impAct. sUch A rich mUsicAl lEgAcy... trUly phEnOmEnAl. trAcing thE timElinE Of michAEl’s lifE - frOm thE hUmblE bEginnings Of thE jAcksOn 5 tO his dynAmic risE tO stArdOm And thE mEdiA circUs thAt his lifE bEcAmE - lEAvEs mE fEEling inspirEd by his gEniUs bUt At thE sAmE timE dEspOndEnt On AccOUnt Of thE tOll thAt cElEbrity tOOk On him. in mAny wAys hE is A prOdUct Of OUr timEs – pOstEr bOy fOr thE mUlti-billiOn dOllAr ExcEssEs Of A mUsic indUstry All tOO rEAdy tO rEpAckAgE rAw tAlEnt intO whAtEvEr fOrmAt is mOst pAlAtAblE fOr mAss cOnsUmptiOn. if thE trUth bE knOwn, thEsE dAys rAw tAlEnt isn’t EvEn A nEcEssAry pOint Of dEpArtUrE. sOUl? nO... sOld.

nOw... my lAmEnt fOr thE king Of pOp brings mE tO thE crUx Of thE dilEmmA thAt’s bEEn bUgging mE lAtEly. At thE risk Of sOUnding A whOlE lOt mOrE prEhistOric thAn i Am... thEy jUst dOn’t mAkE Em likE thEy UsEd tO.
Or if i might rEvisE this AdAgE... thE prOblEm is in thE mAking. bAck in thE dAy EvErything wAs lEss mAnUfActUrEd And cOntrivEd. if sOmEOnE cOUld sing & dAncE, yOU wOUld stick thEm On A stAgE And wAtch thEm sing & dAncE. nOw it’s 2009 – thE AgE Of mAdE in chinA, drivE thrOUgh mEAls And digitAl sOlUtiOns. thE Air is tEEming with invisiblE infOrmAtiOn, nAtUrE stAvEd Off with bOtOx & silicOnE, pEOplE sOciAlisEd in cybEr spAcE And mOrAl cOdEs ArticUlAtEd in dOllAr vAlUEs. nOthing is As it wAs.

i cAmE AcrOss A cOUplE Of fAmily hEirlOOms rEcEntly. twO hAnd pAintEd plAqUEs thAt my grAndfAthEr hAd mAdE bAck in thE fiftiEs; hE mAdE his living As A sign writEr. i AlwAys thOUght his jOb sOUndEd likE sO mUch fUn. i nEvEr hAd A chAncE tO mEEt my mOthEr’s fAthEr. hE diEd frOm A hEArt AttAck whEn shE wAs qUitE yOUng. thE pAir Of plAqUEs wErE mAdE with A crAftsmAnship, A stEAdy hAnd And A pAtiEncE thAt in 2009 sEEms rEdUndAnt. sAd tO wAtch simplE plEAsUrEs mAkE wAy fOr prOfit-drivEn, high-tEch EfficiEncy. rEflEcting On thE AntiqUity, thE impErfEctiOn And thE chArm Of thEsE kEEpsAkEs lEAvEs mE wOndEring whAt cOmpArAblE trEAsUrEs my dEscEndAnts might hOpE tO stUmblE UpOn whEn i Am nO lOngEr Of this EArth. i hAvE tO sAy it’s nOt lOOking sO crAsh hOt right nOw. Of cOUrsE i’ll kEEp thAt thrillEr LP AsidE fOr thEm... And thErE is EvidEncE thAt i knOw my wAy ArOUnd A sEwing mAchinE... i dO in fAct hAvE A cAchE Of fAmily phOtOs (nOt jUst digitAl filEs... prints!) And my vintAgE Art cOllEctiOn will pUt A smilE On sOmEOnE’s fAcE fOr sUrE tOO. bUt rEAlly i gUEss thE mOrAl tO this stOry is thAt wE might dO OUrsElvEs A fAvOUr by slOwing things dOwn A littlE. bE sElf-mAdE with lOvE And EvEr wAry Of cOmprOmisEs pAssEd in thE nAmE Of prOgrEss.

bOys, tOys n tErrOrism

While images and accusations of terrorism feature prominently in the mainstream media, a universally agreed upon definition of terrorism evades us. This is due in part to the subjective nature of describing terrorism. As American political critic Chomsky points out “It’s hard to craft a definition of terror that applies solely to the terror that they carry out against us and our clients, but excludes the terror (often far worse) that we and our clients carry out against them.” The us/them dichotomy referred to here is a crucial consideration in observing and understanding how issues of terrorism are addressed in the public sphere. Political discussion of terrorism is often scripted in unconditional terms of good versus evil to engender moral panic. The profit-driven media amplify the pitch of panic to shape the debate further. Little attention is paid to the cause of conflict and absolute attention is paid to the effect. From this reactionary position politicians can assign blame to an ominous ‘other’ and be absolved of accountability. Although every conflict or dispute has two sides, through the smokescreen of moral panic the public is informed by fear rather than rationale. This atmosphere of vulnerability is the ideal condition for the state to step in to restore ‘order’ and thus maintain hegemony amidst a sense of crisis.
In the media coverage of the September 11 terrorist attacks in the USA in 2001, then President George W Bush announced unequivocally “You’re either on our side or you’re on the side of the terrorists”. Rather than exploring the possible causes of this thing we call terrorism and seeking out a peaceful solution the Bush administration’s reaction was to indict the speculative Islamic ‘other’ and declare a ‘War on Terror’; a “facile polarization which demonizes dissent and muzzles critical debate.” (New Internationalist) This public crusade against terrorism instilled fear and triggered devout patriotism in Americans and bolstered the President's approval rating to an unprecedented 90%.
While the history of terrorism dates back beyond the inception of the modern nation-state, the September 11 attacks immediately took the title of the largest and most notorious act of terrorism in modern history. The world looked on in awe at saturated media coverage of Islamic terrorists in hijacked civilian airliners attacking the Pentagon and the twin towers of the World Trade Center in New York City. In response to the September 11 attacks the United Nations defined terrorism as “criminal acts, including against civilians, committed with the intent to cause death or serious bodily injury, or taking of hostages, with the purpose to provoke a state of terror in the general public or in a group of persons or particular persons, intimidate a population or compel a government or an international organization to do or to abstain from doing any act.”
From this and other similar definitions of terrorism, parallels can be drawn between acts of terrorism, dissent, war, state-sponsored terrorism, rebellion and separatism. Human conflict that results in violence is an unfortunate tendency in all societies. The us/them political discourse pertaining to terrorism deems certain methods (their methods) of violence unacceptable even though U.S. Foreign Policy has a long history of supporting, financing and inspiring state terrorism in Asia, South America and the Middle East.
The scale and spectacle of the September 11 attacks gave a dramatic visual representation of terrorism. Public anxiety and vulnerability escalated as the footage of the attacks was aired countless times. Like civilians in a war zone, American citizens felt vulnerable to the threat of terrorism. Though the likelihood of further attacks was unknown “fear and paranoia were mined by the usual array of right-wing militants, ‘security experts’, knee-jerk patriots and academic hacks from corporate-funded think tanks.” (New Internationalist)
I was living in New York at the time and in the months following the attacks the city was stifled by uncertainty and distrust. As revisions were made to the death toll, the President waxed lyrical with a spurious rhetoric of weapons of mass destruction and commercial TV and radio broadcasts transmitted misguided propaganda. The Department of Homeland Security implemented a colour-coded system for measuring and communicating the terrorist threat level in the U.S. Every time an Amber Alert was announced duct tape sales would surge as the credulous masses prepared to seal their windows. And though there were no successive attacks in New York I was bombarded with daily Threat Condition warnings. Discussion of an “Axis of Evil” dominated the media and a spate of racist attacks against Muslim Americans stirred the melting pot.
The fear and ambivalence that New Yorkers felt, and indeed the entire Western world felt, was a natural response to tragedy and conflict. Fear breeds vulnerability and vulnerability in turn provides a window of opportunity for the hegemonic institutions of government and media to manipulate public perception to the tune of dominant ideology. Where people lack experience on which to make a judgement, they accept the dominant ideology. By focusing attention on fear tactics and retaliation the state reinforces it’s role as defender and avenger. Terrorism and counter-terrorism end up shadow-boxing in a theatre of cruelty which by its nature reduces active citizens to fearful, anxious spectators. Meanwhile the underlying lines of power and control remain undisturbed.

pAris... yOU hAd mE At bOnjOUr

it wAs A whirlwind 4-dAy dEbUt in thE city Of lights And bOy wAs it swEEt sEdUctiOn. At OncE i wAs EnAmOUrEd with thE wAy Of living & Of bEing. sO mUch tO AbsOrb, tO hEAr, tO sEE, tO fEEl, tO smEll, tO tAstE, tO lEArn... sO littlE timE.
bUt nO rOOm fOr rEgrEt fOr if pAris tAUght mE OnE thing AbOvE All it is thAt qUAlity dOEs indEEd rEign sUprEmE OvEr mcqUAntity. wOrking with A shOEstring bUdgEt i nEvEr OncE fElt likE i wAs missing OUt On Anything. i didn’t nEEd tO indUlgE in dOm pÉrignOn And fOiE grAs Or drOp A fOrtUnE On thE chAmps-ÉlysÉEs tO gEt whAt i gOt OUt Of pAris. sOmE Of thE bEst mOmEnts i ExpEriEncEd in pAris wErE frEE.
sitting by thE sEinE On A wArm spring AftErnOOn drinking frEnch winE with friEnds - windOw shOpping On winding cObblEstOnE rUEs dOttEd with dUsty Old bOOk shOps And vintAgE clOthing spOts - wAtching ElEgAnt wOmEn in sidEwAlk cAfEs sUcking At cigArs - sAmpling frOmAgE At thE mArkEt – EnjOying thE simplE & timElEss mOdE Of pAssing frEnch fAshiOnistAs.
it wAs All i cOUld dO jUst tO hOld bAck frOm singing All mAry-pOppins-likE “thEsE ArE A fEw Of my fAvOUritE things.”

And thOUgh cOnspicUOUs cOnsUmptiOn wAs nOt On thE AgEndA i did wAnt tO find A littlE piEcE Of pAris thAt i cOUld sqUEEzE in my sUitcAsE And tAkE AwAy with mE. A littlE sOmEthing tO rEmind mE Of my 3-night stAnd with thE rOmAncE cApitAl. thE EUrO wAs flExing And mAking intimidAting fAcEs At thE US dOllAr At thE timE sO i wAsn’t in A grEAt pOsitiOn tO spEnd. i hAd tO chOOsE wisEly.

dOnE sipping On my silky cAfE AU lAit, i spEnt dAy 3 wAndEring ArOUnd lE mArAis. OUtsidE An Old chUrch A crEw Of hipstErs ArmEd with A whOlE lOttA brAss wErE stylEd Up in blUE And gOld And rOcking jAzz stAndArds. Only in pAris! AftEr A fEw pitstOps... qUichE hErE... winE thErE... i fOUnd my littlE tOkEn Of pAris.

mAdE in pAris dEpUis 1936... clAssic whitE lEAthEr snEAkErs... cAptUring thAt qUintEssEntiAl frEnch stylE... spring cOUrts. i fElt likE cindErEllA As i slippEd On my nEw kicks... vOilA... missiOn AccOmplishEd!

At thE timE i knEw nOthing AbOUt spring cOUrts. All i nEEdEd tO knOw wAs thAt thEy wErE frEnch And thAt thEy wOUld rEmind mE Of pAris. fAst fOrwArd tO jUst A fEw wEEks AgO whEn i mEt A friEnd fOr lUnch And thE first thing shE sAid wAs “nicE spring cOUrts”. A cOmplimEnt’s A cOmplEmEnt And i tAkE whAt i cAn gEt sO wE End Up hAving A littlE spring cOUrt cOnvO. sAid friEnd gOEs On tO tEll mE thAt thE shOEs thAt i’m wEAring – thE sAmE shOEs which fOr A yEAr nOw hAvE bEEn my mnEmOnic link tO pAris – ArE thE ExAct sAmE shOEs thAt jOhn lEnnOn And yOkO OnO wOrE thE dAy thAt thEy wErE mArriEd. it rEAlly dOEsn’t gEt Any bEttEr thAn thAt. litErAlly in thE sAmE shOEs As twO Of thE crEAtivE And philOsOphicAl hErOEs Of OUr timE. nOw i knOw it’s jUst A pAir Of shOEs... i hOpE i dOn’t cOmE Off likE sOmE kind Of mAtEriAlist cAUsE i’m jUst nOt... bUt i lOvE lOvE lOvE thE synchrOnicity Of it All.

wOrds

"thE idEAls which hAvE lightEd my wAy, And timE AftEr timE hAvE givEn mE nEw cOUrAgE tO fAcE lifE chEErfUlly, hAvE bEEn kindnEss, bEAUty & trUth. thE tritE sUbjEcts Of hUmAn EffOrts, pOssEssiOns, OUtwArd sUccEss & lUxUry hAvE AlwAys sEEmEd tO mE cOntEmptiblE."
AlbErt EinstEin

QF107 sydnEy > NY viA LA

thErE is sOmEthing strAngEly bEAUtifUl AbOUt AirlinE mEAls.
pErfEctly pOrtiOnEd & rAtiOnEd sErvings Of thE vAriOUs fOOd grOUps dElivErEd in EfficiEntly cOmpArtmEntAlisEd rAmEkins & rEcyclEAblE cOntAinErs.

thE sAlAd is mOrE Of An ElAbOrAtE gArnish.
thE prE-pAckAgEd sprinklE Of sAlt.
thE pEtitE 187ml plAstic winE bOttlE with OnE pErsOn in mind.
thE splAsh Of sAlAd drEssing.
thE mEAsUrEd hint Of swEEtnEss tO sAvE fOr lAst.

i ApprOAch EAch "sEctiOn" Of my mEAl with sUch fOcUs...
it's AlmOst ritUAlistic.
OpErAting in A limitEd spAcE & wOrking with dispOsAblE tOOls - i cAlcUlAtE my gAmE plAn. As i scAn my trAy frOm OnE cOrnEr tO thE nExt with qUiEt cUriOUsity i Am rEAssUrEd by its bAlAncE & simplicity.
thErE is nO tUrbUlEncE hErE
A pErfEctly timEd EnqUiry frOm A sUitAbly pOlitE & impEccAbly grOOmEd flight AttEndAnt...
"wOUld yOU likE sOmE cOffEE mAAm?"
OnE glAncE At my still-sEAlEd shOt Of milk And thE sAchEt Of sUgAr And i AccEpt grAciOUsly. this mAy nOt bE thE finEst cOlOmbiAn blEnd bUt it dOEs indEEd cOmplEtE thE sEqUEncE.
20-30 Odd minUtEs Of distrActiOn frOm thE fAct thAt i Am 10,058 milEs AbOvE thE OcEAn bEing hUrlEd AcrOss timEzOnEs, hEmisphErEs And dAtElinEs.

fEAthErEd friEnd

i wAs wAtching this gUy tOdAy thinking hOw simplE & thErEfOrE EAsy his lifE mUst bE...
jUst Ambling ArOUnd... scrOUngin fOr A bitE tO EAt...
thE OccAsiOnAl mAting ritUAl tO spicE things Up A bit...
nOt rEAlly lOOking whErE hE's gOing...
dOEsn't likE this spOt sO mUch hE jUst high-tAils it tO sOmE plAcE ElsE...
sOUnds kind Of OK right?

wOrds...

mOst Of thE impOrtAnt things in thE wOrld hAvE bEEn AccOmplishEd by pEOplE whO hAvE kEpt On trying whEn thErE sEEmEd tO bE nO hOpE At All
- cArnEgiE

cAn't find my idEntity... hAvE yOU sEEn it?

Ugh... crEdit cArds... thE bAnE Of my ExistEncE!

sO i jUst wEnt OnlinE tO mAkE sUrE my mOnthly pAymEnt hAs gOnE thrOUgh And mAdE thE AnnOying discOvEry thAt my cArd hAs bEEn UsEd fOr A strAight Up bUying frEnzy which i knOw nOthing AbOUt. yEs thAt's right... idEntity thEft. irOnicAlly i hAd stAshEd thAt cArd AwAy sO thAt i wOUld stOp Using it And stArt pAying it Off. mEAnwhilE sOmE cybEr thUg hAs dEcidEd thEy wAnnA bE mE And thEy wAnnA gO shOpping. AirfArEs, hOmEwArEs, pOstAgE, phOnE bills, yOU nAmE it.... thE nEw mE wEnt tO tOwn.

sO At first i wAs rEAlly Angry bUt thEn i cAncEllEd thE cArd And gOt OvEr it. bUt i'vE bEEn thinking A lOt AbOUt thE idEA Of idEntity thEft. i'vE bEEn thinking A lOt AbOUt idEntity. think AbOUt thE irOny At wOrk hErE... in this sOciEty whErE OUr idEntity is tO sUch A lArgE ExtEnt dictAtEd by thE mAss mEdiA And thE pOwErs thAt bE... And thEn idEntity bEcOmEs this virtUAl cOstUmE thAt wE cAn stEp in And OUt Of And thAt sOmEOnE wE dOn't EvEn knOw cAn try On fOr sizE. whAt is idEntity AnywAy? my nOtiOn Of idEntity might bE kindA UtOpiAn bUt i wOUld sAy it is OnE's EssEncE As shApEd by OnE's EnvirOnmEnt. thE inflUEncE Of EnvirOnmEnt is inEvitAblE bUt fOr thE sAkE Of hUmAn individUAlity i hOpE nOt pArAmOUnt.

i think jEAn grAE nAilEd it in hEr sOng "dOn't rUsh mE" whEn shE tAlks AbOUt bEing On thE right pAth tO whO shE's gOnnA bE At lAst:

"...still rEmAin whO i cAmE dOwn tO EArth tO bE
it's nOt jEAn grAE, thAt's jUst A nAmE, yOU'll sEE"

sO this idEntity hEist is rEAlly A jOkE On thE idEntity thiEf bEcAUsE thAt idEntity wAs jUst A rOUgh drAft AnywAys. EvEn As yOU rEAd this i'm tOiling AwAy in thE lAb Of lifE wOrking On thE nEw imprOvEd vErsiOn... AlwAys will bE!

tAmil prOtEst

is thAt A lUmp in yOUr thrOAt Or yOU jUst hAppy tO sEE mE?

sAtUrdAy mOrning, sO cAUght Up listEning tO this rOb swift mix I missEd my stOp And EndEd Up At mArtin plAcE. mArtin plAcE is thE cOmmErciAl cOrE Of dOwntOwn sydnEy. it's whErE thE 'mAtrix' scEnE with thE wOmAn in thE rEd drEss wAs shOt. it's bEEn A minUtE sincE i wAs AnywhErE nEAr mArtin plAcE... At lEAst 6 yEArs i'd sAy. it's kind Of A drAg thAt i missEd my stOp bUt At thE sAmE timE i'm cUriOUs tO rEvisit A pArt Of tOwn thAt i hAvEn't sEEn fOr sO lOng. As i EmErgE frOm thE sUbwAy i nOticE A wEird chAnting sAmplE thAt i'vE nEvEr hEArd bEfOrE On this mix. tUrns OUt it's nO sAmplE.
it's A mAssivE prOtEst AgAinst thE virtUAl gEnOcidE Of thE tAmils in thE sri lAnkAn civil wAr... And i'vE wAlkEd strAight intO it. mEgAphOnE mEssAgEs bOUncing All OvEr thE plAcE. thE prOtEst is pEAcEfUl bUt pAssiOnAtE.

bEfOrE i'vE EvEn mAdE sEnsE Of whAt thE prOtEst is ActUAlly AbOUt i stArt tO gEt thAt fEEling. i'm nO strAngEr tO thAt fEEling. it's A gOOd thing i hAd my sUnniEs On cAUsE thAt fEEling tEnds tO bring with it A fEw tEArs. it's thE fEEling i gEt whEn i'm At A dOpE cOncErt. it's thE fEEling i gOt whEn ObAmA wAs ElEctEd. it's thE fEEling i gEt whEn sOmEbOdy spEAks OUt. it's thE fEEling i gEt whEn A sitUAtiOn fOrcEs mE tO tAkE A stAnd. it's A fEEling thAt is EqUAl pArts sAdnEss & ExhilArAtiOn. thE ExhilArAtiOn cOmEs frOm finding A vOicE & hAving A sEnsE Of sOlidArity. thE sAdnEss cOmEs frOm knOwing thAt i cAn't AlwAys hAvE thE fEEling.

i'm lUcky tO hAvE stUmblEd AcrOss thE dEmOnstrAtiOn. i didn't knOw A whOlE lOt AbOUt thE plight Of thE tAmils in sri lAnkA. nOw i knOw mOrE. first lEt mE jUst mEntiOn thAt M.I.A. is tAmil. hEr fAthEr hAs bEEn EngAgEd in thE tAmil indEpEndEncE strUgglE sincE shE wAs A bAby.
thE tAmil tigErs ArE A sEpArAtist Army whO hAvE bEEn fighting fOr tAmil indEpEndEncE frOm sri lAnkA sincE 1983. thE cOnflict hAs clAimEd mOrE thAn 70000 livEs. thE wEstErn wOrld hAs - sUrprisE sUrprisE - slAppEd thE Ol 'TERRORIST' tAg On thE tAmil tigErs.... mEAnwhilE bAck At thE rAnch stAtE-spOnsOrEd Ethnic clEAnsing gOEs UnchEckEd. sO whO dEfinEs tErrOrism? thE 'WAR ON TERROR' bAnnEr gEts wAvEd ArOUnd A whOlE lOt thEsE dAys. sEEms tO mE thAt thE nOtiOn Of tErrOrism crEAtEs A vEry cOnvEniEnt 'Us & thEm' dichOtOmy which Only sErvEs tO mAkE thE sO-cAllEd first wOrld lOOk likE thE gOOd gUys. i smEll A rAt!

whAt wOUld yOU sAy cOnstitUtEs tErrOrism?
lOOk At thE indiscriminAtE viOlEncE thAt US fOrcEs hAvE inflictEd On irAqi civiliAns... i'd sAy thAt's tErrOrism. lOOk At thE tOxic chEmicAl wArfArE thAt isrAEli militAry hAvE UnlEAshEd On thE pAlEstiniAn pEOplE... sOUnds likE tErrOrism tO mE. isn't it strAngE thAt thE OpprEssOr criEs victim And thE OpprEssEd ArE brAndEd tErrOrists?

sOOOO.... whAt ArE yOU trying tO sAy?

it’s AnOthEr bEAUtifUl dAy in sydnEy. thE sky is bright blUE And hUgE with nOt sO mUch As A smUdgE Of clOUd. thE sUn is wArm nOt hOt And it fEEls gOOd jUst tO bE. fElA kUti is AlivE in my hEAdphOnEs lAying dOwn thE pErfEct sOUndtrAck fOr A pErfEct dAy. i hAvE An hOUr tO kill bEtwEEn clAssEs. hAving jUst rEAd An AnthrOpOlOgicAl stUdy Of thE nUEr pEOplEs Of sOUthErn sUdAn i Am inspirEd tO cOndUct A littlE fiEldwOrk Of my Own. pEOplE wAtching On cAmpUs is ripE. my first ObsErvAtiOn is An AwkwArd yOUng bOy wAlking AlOnE. his shOUldErs ArE hUnchEd And his Arms dOn’t sEEm tO bE intErEstEd in dOing mUch mOrE thAn dAngling limply by his sidE. his fAcE is blAnk. i gUEss hE’s nOt As tUrnEd On by thE blUE skiEs As i Am. his OvEr-sizEd t-shirt cOmplEtEs thE pictUrE. thE hEAvy blOck lEttErs stAmpEd AcrOss his chEst And tOrsO dEclArE:

EVERY
BODY
NEEDS
SOME
BODY

And sO thE thEmE Of my fiEldwOrk is dEcidEd... cOmmUnicAtiOn thrOUgh t-shirt slOgAns. nO sOOnEr hAvE i hAd this rEvElAtiOn thAn my nExt spEcimEn ApprOAchEs. thE sUbjEct is A mUscUlAr, nEAtly grOOmEd gUy with yOUr stAndArd shOrt bAck n sidEs hAircUt. hE is EngAgEd in A fAirly AnimAtEd cOnvErsAtiOn with A smAll grOUp Of pEErs. thEy AppEAr tO bE mAking A bEE linE fOr thE mAnning bAr. his clOsE-fitting rOyAl blUE t-shirt rEAds:

great minds drink alike

this is grEAt... mAtEriAl, mAtEriAl, mAtEriAl!! A prEppy girl with A pictUrE pErfEct mAnicUrE And tOO-smOOthE hAir glidEs by. At first glAncE hEr tOtE bAg cOUld bE strAight OUt Of thE pAgEs Of A j-crEw cAtAlOgUE bUt On clOsEr inspEctiOn, cUE thEmE frOm twilight zOnE, i sEE thAt it tOO cArriEs A mEssAgE:

Are you happily spending every day?

wOw... dEEp. dO yOU think shE’s stUdying EcOnOmics? mAybE philOsOhy? mAybE shE’s A mEmbEr Of thE Anti-glObAlisAtiOn sOciEty. Or mAybE thErE’s nOthing cryptic AbOUt it At All. shE cOUld jUst bE A dEvOUt hillsOngEr... Ugh! fElA crEscEndOs As i nOticE thAt my hOUr is jUst AbOUt Up. i dAncE On thE insidE All thE wAy tO my nExt clAss. A sEA Of sOciOlOgy sOphOmOrEs ArE spilling OUt Of thE lEctUrE thEAtrE. OnE stUdEnt in pArticUlAr cAtchEs my EyE. his t-shirt sAys:

Improve your Marx

snAp! whAt A wAy tO wrAp Up A sOlid hOUr Of stEAlth slOgAn EspiOnAgE. tOO bAd i didn’t hAvE my cAmErA On mE. bUt this is jUst thE bEginning. wElcOmE tO prOjEct slOgAnOlOgy. thEy sAy yOU ArE whAt yOU EAt. i’m thinking yOU ArE whAt yOU wEAr. Or mAybE yOU jUst wAnt tO bE whAt yOU wEAr. lEt’s tAlk AbOUt this.

listEn Up

sOmEtimEs thE UnivErsE jUst sEnds yOU thAt littlE sign, thAt pAt On thE bAck Or thAt cUE tO kEEp yOU mOving in thE right dirEctiOn. i’vE bEEn A gOOd girl this wEEk. it cAllEd fOr sOmE fAncy fOOtwOrk bUt i mAnAgEd tO dO thE nEcEssAry hOmEwOrk, rEAd thE rElEvAnt rEAdings, lAy dOwn A sOlid fOUndAtiOn fOr my first EssAy And pOst thE ObligAtOry blOg (is it jUst mE Or dOEs thAt sOUnd kindA fUnny?) sO tOdAy whEn i scOrEd A gOOd sEAt On thE AftErnOOn rUsh hOUr trAin i thOUght it wAs Only fAir thAt i trEAt mysElf tO A littlE qUAlity timE with my ipOd. i cOnsidErEd rEAding And listEning At thE sAmE timE. thE diligEnt stUdEnt mUst bE EfficiEnt with hEr AllOcAtiOn Of timE... All cOnfUciOUs likE. bUt thEn i gOt tO thinking hOw thE ‘mUlti-tAsk’ ApprOAch wOUld cOmprOmisE bOth my rEAding And my listEning tO sOmE ExtEnt. “fUck it” wErE thE ExAct wOrds Of my innEr diAlOgUE... i dEsErvE this mUsic And this mUsic hAs A right tO bE hEArd! thE Only rEmAining qUEstiOn wAs ExActly whAt shOUld i listEn tO?? my cOmmitmEnt tO this bOld Act Of stUdEnt cOmmUtE rEbElliOn cAllEd fOr A tOp shElf listEning ExpEriEncE. mEdiOcrE mUsic wAs nOt An OptiOn. wEll lUckily thErE’s nO mEdiOcrE mUsic On my ipOd sO mAking this dEcisiOn wAs mOrE likE skimming thE crEAm. ActUAlly thErE is thAt OnE lindA rOnstAdt AlbUm On my ipOd... hOw thE hEll did shE End Up On thErE!? AnywAys it didn’t tAkE mE lOng tO mAkE Up my mind. As thE trAin pUllEd OUt Of cEntrAl stAtiOn i clOsEd my EyEs & kickEd bAck tO thE mOOdy tOnEs Of thE R.A.T. sOmEwhErE bEtwEEn sUthErlAnd And wAtErfAll stAtiOns thE AlbUm EndEd. i lOOkEd dOwn At my ipOd thinking i might indUlgE in A fEw mOrE tUnEs. i mAdE A sElEctiOn, hit plAy And wAitEd fOr thE silEncE tO EvApOrAtE . bUt thErE wAs tO bE nO sUch lUck bEcAUsE whilE i sAt thErE cOmplEtEly rEchArgEd frOm thE mUsic my bAttEry wAs cOmplEtEly ExhAUstEd. thErE hAd bEEn jUst thE right AmOUnt Of jUicE lEft in thAt sUckEr tO gEt mE thrOUgh. nOt A drOp mOrE... nOt A drOp lEss. hOw pErfEct!

mEdicinAl

2008 wAs A bitch slAp Of A yEAr. yEs, it dElivErEd mE OnE stEp clOsEr tO sElf knOwlEdgE & sElf dEtErminAtiOn (And fOr thAt i'm grAtEfUl) bUt nOt withOUt A strUgglE.
hAvE yOU EvEr bEEn sick in AmEricA? hAvE yOU EvEr bEEn sick And UninsUrEd in AmEricA? i hAd hEArd thE hOrrOr stOriEs Of bAnkrUptcy, dEniAl Of prOpEr trEAtmEnt And cUrAblE illnEssEs gOing UndiAgnOsEd bEcAUsE pAtiEnts cAn't AffOrd bAsic hEAlth sErvicEs.
in fAct, i hAd jUst wAtchEd michAEl mOOrE's sickO thE wEEk bEfOrE my Own hEAlth lEt mE dOwn And i fOUnd mysElf At thE mErcy Of thE AmEricAn hEAlth cArE systEm. i UsE thAt tErm vEry lOOsEly As thErE wAs nOt A whOlE lOt Of cAring gOing On.
bUt this is nOt AbOUt thAt. this is AbOUt bUrmA, Or myAnmAr... dEpEnding whErE yOU stAnd. nOw whAt dOEs bUrmA hAvE tO dO with thE wAcknEss Of thE AmEricAn hEAlth (Un)cArE systEm??? this wEEk i schEdUlEd An AppOintmEnt with A lOcAl dOctOr. nOw thAt i Am bAck in AUstrAliA i Am cOvErEd by mEdicArE. frEE mEdicAl AttEntiOn, frEE diAgnOstics, frEE hOspitAls And virtUAlly frEE mEdicinE. this is whErE i intrOdUcE my fAvOUritE pErsOn Of thE wEEk... dr mOn tUt. dr tUt is A bUrmEsE ExpAt whO hAs livEd in AUstrAliA fOr thE lAst dEcAdE. hE spEciAlisEs in crisis cArE fOr rEfUgEEs And migrAnt hEAlth sErvicEs. hUmAnitAriAn in thE hOUsE!! sO i rOck Up tO mEEt dr mOn tUt with 8 yEArs wOrth Of AccUmUlAtEd hEAlth cOncErns. EvErything frOm EAr wAx tO kidnEys, thyrOid tO sUn spOts, irOn dEficiEncy tO nEUrObUggin. i jUst lAid it On him... pOOr gUy.
AftEr hAlf An hOUr Of cOnsUltAtiOn, prEliminAry tEsting And rEfErrAl drAfting i ExhAlEd... AUdibly. this is hEAlth cArE. i knEw i hAd fOUnd An Ally in dr mOn tUt. hE pAtiEntly listEnEd tO my gripE AbOUt thE dOdgy stAndArds Of US hEAlth cArE. hE EvEn OffErEd Up his Own AnEcdOtEs Of mEdicAl dEbAclEs thAt hE ExpEriEncEd whilE trAvElling in thE US with his fAmily. thE ExchAngE rEstOrEd my fAith in mOdErn mEdicinE. it AlsO mAdE mE cUriOUs AbOUt bUrmA.
OnE Of my fAvOUritE chEAp rEstAUrAnts in NY is villAgE mingAlA. thE dEliciOUs bUrmEsE fOOd thErE shOUld hAvE bEEn EnOUgh tO stir A dEEpEr cUriOUsity in mE AbOUt thE cUltUrE bEhind thE cUisinE. bUt if thAt didn't dO it mEEting dr tUt did!
sO it tUrns OUt bUrmA is kindA bUstEd pOliticAlly And EcOnOmicAlly. fOllOw thE link fOr All thE grimy dEtAils... plEAsE rEAd. bUt bUrmA is rich in tErms Of spiritUAlity And trAditiOnAl cUltUrE. And thAt's thE mOst impOrtAnt pOint i nEEd tO mAkE. wE, yOU And mE, nEEd tO gEt bAck On trAck. wE nEEd tO sEt OUr sitEs On things OthEr thAn wEAlth And pOwEr. wE nEEd A littlE mOrE sOUl.

dOwn by lAw

twAs thE night bEfOrE mArdi grAs And As might bE ExpEctEd OxfOrd strEEt wAs A virtUAl rAinbOw Of spArkly EnsEmblEs. thE thrOng Of hAndbAg hOUsE spillEd OUt Of thE clUbs And intO thE AtmOsphErE. fOr thE UninitiAtEd lEt mE givE yOU thE lOwdOwn... mArdi grAs 101 sO tO spEAk. sydnEy is hOmE tO OnE Of thE wOrld's lArgEst gAy cOmmUnitiEs.
Of cOUrsE sAn frAnciscO is Up thErE AswEll. irOnicAlly thE 2 citiEs ArE OfficiAlly dEscribEd As 'sistEr citiEs'.
EvEry yEAr thE gAy & lEsbiAn mArdi grAs pArAde tEArs thrOUgh thE city in A mAssivE cElEbrAtiOn Of gAy pridE. dykEs On bikEs, sExy sAilOr bOys, bEdAzzlEd drAg qUEEns And cybEr AndrOgEnEs. thE pArAdE hAs bEcOmE OnE Of thE mOst significAnt EvEnts On sydnEy's cUltUrAl cAlEndAr drAwing spEctAtOrs And pArticipAnts frOm All cOrnErs Of thE glObE. mArdi grAs EvE is typicAlly injEctEd with An Air Of Anticipation And ExcitEmEnt, EspEciAlly AlOng OxfOrd strEEt (AkA thE pink strip).
hAving jUst ArrivEd bAck in sydnEy AftEr living in nEw yOrk fOr 8 yEArs i thOUght it wOUld bE fUn tO tAkE A strOll AlOng thE pink strip AndgEt A tAstE Of sOmE O thAt mArdi grAs fEvEr. As i tUrnEd OntO OxfOrd strEEt thE first thing i sAw wAs hArdly fEstivE. A gAng Of pOlicE OfficErs tAping Off A sEctiOn Of thE sidEwAlk thAt wAs littErEd with brOkEn glAss And A smAll pOOl Of blOOd. things wErE nOt lOOking vEry frEE, gAy nOr hAppy. my impUlsE wAs tO rEAch fOr my cAmErA And dOcUmEnt this Ugly scEnE. i snAppEd A fEw shOts bEfOrE A clEArly sExUAlly frUstrAtEd pOlicE OfficEr tOld mE tOkEEp it mOving. i ObligEd. my friEnds & i wAlkEd On And tAlkEd AbOUt whAt wE hAd jUst sEEn. sOmEOnE brOkE thE hEAvinEss with sOmE cOmic rEliEf And wE All hAd A gOOd lAUgh. sOmEtimEs thAt's All yOU cAn dO.
sEcOnds lAtEr wE wErE AccOstEd by 2 Angry plAin-clOthEd cOps shOving bAdgEs in my fAcE And insisting thAt i dElEtE thE phOtOs i hAd jUst tAkEn. thE diAlOgUE wEnt sOmEthing likE this:

cOp - yOU think this is fUnny dO yOU!?

mE - i'm sOrry... whAt ArE yOU tAlking AbOUt?

cOp - yOU think it's fUnny thAt sOmEbOdy wAs glAssEd On thE strEEt dO yOU!?

mE - firstly, sincE whEn is lAUghtEr A crimE? sEcOndly, whAtEvEr my friEnds & i mAy Or mAy nOt hAvE sAid tO EAch OthEr hAs nOthing tO dO with yOU.


cOp - yEAh wEll wipE thAt smirk Off yOUr fAcE And dElEtE thOsE pictUrEs yOU jUst tOOk!

mE - i dOn't UndErstAnd yOUr rEqUEst? ExActly whAt lAw is it thAt yOU'rE trying tO EnfOrcE?

cOp - yOU'rE ObviOUsly drUnk. this will mAkE A lOt mOrE sEnsE tO yOU in thE mOrning!

mE - ActUAlly... i dOUbt it.

cOp - listEn, jUst dElEtE thOsE pictUrEs... nOw!!

mE - wEll likE i sAid i wOUld likE yOU tO ExplAin On whAt lEgAl grOUnds yOU ArE mAking this dEmAnd. this sEEms ridicUlOUs tO mE.

cOp - yOU ArE inhibiting A pOlicE OpErAtiOn!

mE - by tAking A phOtO? Or by lAUghing On thE strEEt?

cOp - Oh yOU think this is rEAl fUnny dOn't yOU! givE mE yOUr licEnsE.

mE - sUrE. wOUldn't yOUr timE bE bEttEr spEnt dEAling with thE pErsOn whO crEAtEd thAt mEss OvEr thErE? whAt's yOUr nAmE AnywAy?


cOp - OfficEr wOOdlEy... W O O D L E Y (shE spAt this OUt sO hArd i fElt thE sprAy On my fAcE) i'm bAsEd At sUrry hills pOlicE stAtiOn ArOUnd thE cOrnEr.

mE - yEs i knOw whErE thAt is.

cOp - Oh i bEt yOU dO.

sO dEspitE this bAntEr i wAlkEd AwAy frOm thE scEnAriO with A fEw pictUrEs Of blOOd On thE grOUnd. it wAsn't EvEn thAt impOrtAnt fOr mE tO hAvE thE phOtOs. my rEsistAncE wAs fUEllEd by thE pOlicE OfficEr's hOstility. i fElt likE i wAs hArrAssEd withOUt dUE cAUsE... thAt cOp wAs jUst gEtting Off On thE pOwEr thAt hEr jOb AffOrds hEr. thAt rEAlly bOthErs mE.
mAybE thErE is A lAw prOhibiting mE frOm tAking phOtOs Of A crimE scEnE. if thErE is it mUst bE hEAvy On thE syllAblEs Or sOmEthing cAUsE OfficEr W O O D L E Y sUrE wAsn't AblE tO ArticUlAtE it. whAtEvEr thE cAsE i'm wEll UnimprEssEd. sO i stOOd Up fOr mysElf And dEfiEd this bUllshit... grEAt. bUt hOw mAny pEOplE gEt bEAt dOwn by this kind Of trAsh tAlk? hOw mAny pEOplE gEt wrOngly AccUsEd? hOw mAny pEOplE ArE UnnEcEssArily prOvOkEd? hOw mAny pEOplE gEt prOfilEd fOr nO gOOd rEAsOn?

bElt it OUt

sO cAn wE tAlk AbOUt thE UnnEcEssAry bElt fAd fOr A minUtE. lOOk clOsEly And All ArOUnd tOwn yOU'll sEE fAshiOnistAs wEAring bElts in wAys thAt sErvE nO pUrpOsE OthEr thAn pUrE dEcOrAtiOn. thErE ArE sEvErAl vAriAtiOns On thE thEmE. OnE pOpUlAr EnsEmblE is thE bElt OvEr A bAggy cArdigAn. sOmE fAshiOnistAs cinch in thEir OvErsizE tEEs Or tAnks with thE bElt. thE cOmbO thAt i find mOst AmUsing is thE lOOsE fitting, mEn's stylE bUsinEss shirt wOrn As A drEss And... yOU gUEssEd it.. thE UnnEcEssAry bElt dOing it's thing ArOUnd thE wAist. this OnE is vEry pOpUlAr in sydnEy. i hAd Only hAlf-nOticEd this EmErging fAshiOnism. it wAsn't Until A friEnd rEcEntly brOUght thE UnnEcEssAry bElt phEnOmEnOn tO my AttEntiOn thAt i rEAlly pAid it Any mind. sAid friEnd hAs bEEf with thE trEnd. shE gOt hOt & bOthErEd jUst tAlking AbOUt it. shE's A prActicAl pErsOn And sO thE fAshiOn vs. fUnctiOn fActOr hAs EvErything tO dO with why shE jUst cAn't gEt dOwn with UnnEcEssAry bElts. if thErE ArE nO bElt lOOps thEn thErE's nOt sUppOsEd tO bE A bElt. pErsOnAlly i'm nOt sO zErO tOlErAncE AbOUt thE UnnEcEssAry bElt. yOU wOn't sEE mE wEAring OnE bUt tO EAch thEir Own. As A pErsOn whO is intErEstEd in thE sOciOlOgy Of fAshiOn hOwEvEr... i nEvEr likE tO sEE pEOplE mindlEssly rEhAshing stylE thAt is dictAtEd tO thEm by mAgAzinEs And thE mEdiA. whEn yOU chOOsE whAt yOU wAnnA wEAr yOU ArE chOOsing idEntity. fAshiOn cAn bE sUch A pOwErfUl tOOl Of sElf-ExprEssiOn. wEAr it wEll.

cUss-tOmAry

sO i'vE bEEn bAck in AUstrAliA fOr jUst On A wEEk And i hAvE tO Admit it is kindA bEwildEring tO bE hErE. EvEn thOUgh i'm frOm hErE i Am fEEling A littlE AliEn... sAmE tip As nEO whEn hE pOppEd thAt rEd pill. i gUEss 8 yEArs Of living in nEw yOrk city is bOUnd tO hAvE An impAct On whO i Am right? jUst bEcAUsE i nEvEr pickEd Up An AmEricAn AccEnt dOEsn't mEAn OthEr AspEcts Of my pErsOnA didn't shift. bEfOrE i flEw thE cOUp, lifE in AUstrAliA wAs thE Only lifE i knEw. thE brim Of my 'ignOrAnt bliss' cAp cAst A shAdOw OvEr my viEw Of lifE. mUch likE A bAby lEArns its first wOrds frOm its pArEnts, i spOsE i wAs infOrmEd by my immEdiAtE EnvirOnmEnt. my EnqUiring mind, UndErpinnEd by sOmE kind Of inhErEnt rEstlEssnEss, hAs sincE lEd mE tO sOmE intErEsting plAcEs & ExpEriEncEs. AmOngst thOsE is my AccidEntAl pilgrimAgE Of sOrts tO NYC. thAt chAptEr dEf ExpOsEd mE tO nEw wAys Of thinking & Of bEing. sOmE Of which i EmbrAcE, OthErs which i rEjEct. thAt's thE bEAUty Of it rEAlly.
AnywAys All Of this lEAds mE tO thE ObsErvAtiOn
thAt i wAntEd tO mAkE And chEw thE fAt Of....
it's AbOUt thE swEAring.
AUstrAliAns rEAlly lOvE tO fUcking swEAr.
thEy dOn't jUst fUcking swEAr whEn thEy'rE Angry.
thEy dOn't jUst fUcking swEAr tO cAst insUlts.
thEy dOn't jUst fUcking swEAr whEn sOmEthing gOEs rEAl pEArshApEd rEAl qUick.
thEy jUst swEAr... All thE fUcking timE.
i hAvE Only bEEn hErE fOr A wEEk And i hAvE AlrEAdy cOmE AcrOss 2 pEOplE with tOUrEttE syndrOmE! i mEAn... At lEAst i think thEy hAd tOUrEttE syndrOmE.
i'm nO dOctOr bUt bOth Of thE sUspEcts sAid "shit" Or "fUck" As mUch As A vAllEygirl
sAys "likE" Or "tOtAlly".
this shit (cOUldn't rEsist) is crAzy!!!
nOw dOn't gEt mE wrOng... i'm nOt dissing this AUssiE trAit. i jUst find it AmUsing....
ActUAlly AlmOst rEfrEshing. OnE Of my ObsErvAtiOns Of US cUltUrE - hAving bEEn in thE thick Of it fOr AlmOst A dEcAdE - wAs thAt by n lArgE thE pEOplE ArE kindA rEprEssEd.
i gUEss thE chUrch And thE gOvErnmEnt... Or mAybE i shOUld sAy thE chUrch A.k.A. thE gOvErnmEnt... hAs A lOt tO dO with thAt. i think thErE is prObAbly sOmEthing vEry
libErAting AbOUt UninhibitEd cUssing. might hAvE tO givE it A gO.

shAdEs Of grEy

cAll mE thE frEAk mAgnEt. i think it's fAir tO sAy thAt i AttrAct EccEntrics And OUt-thE-bOx-thinkErs. it's nOt likE i'mExtrA rAdicAl Or Anything. i jUst ApprEciAtE kinks in thE systEm. my lifE tO dAtE hAs bEEn grAcEd by EncOUntErs with All sOrts Of wEird & wOndErfUl pEOplE. All chArActErs On thE cArmEncitA shOw. sOmE rEcUrring in mUltiplE EpisOdEs, OthErs mAking A cAmEO splAsh. sOmE bEhind thE scEnEs And A fEw fEAtUring in stArring rOlEs. OnE Of my rEcEnt fAvOUritEs is jOE. jOE is A sixty-sOmEthing st. thOmAs ExpAt living in BK, NY sincE his yOUth mAny mOOns Ago. Up Until A wEEk AgO jOE wAs my lAndlOrd. i'm prEtty sUrE my bAsEmEnt ApArtmEnt wAs An illEgAl rEntAl. my rEnt chEcks wErE tO bE mAdE OUt tO jOE's sistEr whO i nEvEr mEt And whOsE nAmE jOE wAs nEvEr EntirEly sUrE hOw tO spEll. jOE didn't wAnt tO dEclArE his rEntAl incOmE bEcAUsE it wOUld cOmprOmisE his Eligibility fOr pUblic hEAlthcArE. jOE is On diAlysis. hE's nOt sUppOsEd tO drink bUt whEnEvEr i wOUld thrOw A pArty in thAt ApArtmEnt hE wOUld bE thE first OnE thrOUgh thE dOOr - rOckin his drink And his 2-stEp. i think my pArtiEs wErE A rEAl highlight On jOE's sOciAl cAlEndAr. his dAUghtER pAssEd AwAy whEn shE wAs rOUnd AbOUt my AgE And i think sOmEthing AbOUt hAving mE in thE mix hElpEd him with thAt lOss. thE dAy thAt i lEft BK wAs kindA hEctic And i didn't hAvE A chAncE tO sAy gOOdbyE tO jOE. i fEEl bAd AbOUt thAt. whilE i'm cOOl with my Own cOmpAny thE prOspEct Of bEing sixty-sOmEthing And AlOnE bUms mE OUt.
lAst night i thrEw tOgEthEr A phOtO cOllAgE Of imAgEs Of jOE frOm my lAst pArty... my fArEwEll pArty. i'm gOnnA sEnd him A cOpy. EvEn thOUgh thE cOllAgE is prEtty slAp hAppy i lOvE thE wAy thAt lAyErs Of imAgEs tEll A dEEpEr And mOrE tExtUrEd stOry thAn Any Of thE individUAl imAgEs cOntAinEd within thE cOllAgE. i wAnt tO UsE this principlE with wOrds. ObviOUsly A sEntEncE UsUAlly hAs mOrE impAct thAn A singlE wOrd. bUt i'm tAlking AbOUt cOmbining wOrds, sEntEncEs And phrAsEs thAt dOn't nEcEssArily AlwAys wOrk tOgEthEr Or bElOng tOgEthEr bUt which, whEn lAyErEd thE right wAy, cOnvEy thE divErsity And intricAcy Of my idEAs... shAdEs Of grEy. stAy tUnEd.

thE End is thE bEginning

OK sO i'm still trying tO dEtErminE thE dirEctiOn i wAnnA tAkE with tElling.
fOr nOw yOU gOt mE On sOmE intrOspEctivE shit. i'm On A city-bOUnd trAin wAtching trEEs, hOUsEs, OcEAns And cliff-fAcEs mElt intO A pAssing blUr Of cOlOUr & fOrm. thE hOUr cOmmUtE givEs mE jUst AbOUt EnOUgh timE tO cOllEct my thOUghts & my brEAth bEfOrE my first dAy Of schOOl. UnivErsity thAt is. tOdAy mArks my rEtUrn tO thE wOrld Of AcAdEmiA... nUts nO? bOOks n cOnsciOUsnEss. cOnsciOUsnEss As OppOsEd tO UncOnsciOUsnEss? wEll i'm nOt stUdying phlOsOphy sO lEt's nOt gEt intO thAt.

yEstErdAy i gOt dOwn with An Old friEnd And wE gOt tO tAlking AbOUt lifE & dEAth... And whAt rEAlly mAttErs. A yOUng friEnd Of hErs diEd A wEEk AgO And shE is wOrking thrOUgh it. thE UpsidE wAs thAt thE gUy whO pAssEd wAs stOkEd On his lifE in thE wEEks lEAding Up tO his sUddEn & UnExpEctEd dEAth. hE wAs wOrking On A crUisE bOAt in thE cArribEAn And lOving EvEry minUtE. On this tip wE rEAchEd thE mUtUAl cOnclUsiOn thAt living fOr nOw is thE wAy fOrwArd. i'm AbOUt tO lAUnch mysElf intO A 4-yEAr cOmmitmEnt Of stUdy & sElf-ExplOrAtiOn. dOEs this mEAn i Am living ExclUsivEly fOr my intEndEd End gOAl? this is A trAp i dOn't wAnt tO fAll intO. thE fUtUrE is An AbstrActiOn. it dOEsn't Exist... yEt. And if/whEn it dOEs it wOn't bE thE fUtUrE AnymOrE AnywAys... it will bE nOw. nOt trying tO cOp OUt On sOciAl Or pErsOnAl rEspOnsibility... jUst trying tO bAlAncE EnErgy. sEizE thE dAy! Or sincE my first lEctUrE tOdAy is frEnch 101... s'EmpArEr dE jOUr!

cArmEncitA tElls All...

hEy hEy hEy...
nOt sUrE hOw Or why bUt hErE i Am OnbOArd thE tEchnOlOgy bUllEt trAin tO nOwhErE. this is my first blOgging EndEAvOUr sO crAck OpEn thE vEUvE... gimmE A sOUl clAp.... lEt's gEt this pArty stArtEd... right!
stAy tUnEd... i'm gOnnA tEll it!!!